Saturday, April 1, 2017

Temperance (Part Two)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars
Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 
Iggy -- Designated Sticky
Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)


Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies,

To review, in part one I started off down the main trail but I branched off on a path that led to a critique of H. sapiens tendency to (often with the best of intentions) impose their idea of temperance on other H. sapiens.

This confused my imaginary grandsticky, Iggy, who thought that temperance simply meant refraining from eating an entire box of Girl School cookies in one sitting.

I further muddied the water by making reference to something I call social sanctions which I  didn't define or explore. Thus the need for a part two. 

I'm going to put the thin mints in the fridge for the moment and start with social sanctions. "Some things should be prohibited, some things should be regulated, everything else should be tolerated (but not necessarily socially sanctioned)." -me

Some kids should be banned from the playground (prohibited), and rules are needed for sharing the playground (regulated). Little Timmy's unfortunate habit of picking his nose, anywhere and everywhere, is best curbed by social sanctions.

[Which has exactly WHAT to do with temperance? asks Dana, my imaginary gentlereader.]

"Patience is a virtue." -Sister Mary McGillicuddy

 Wikipedia: "Temperance is defined as moderation or voluntary self-restraint."

Banning Timmy from the playground would constitute cruel and unusual punishment. Who among us hath not picked their nose upon occasion?

Nose picking regulations would be difficult to enforce, and who would want to police nose pickers? Yes, I know you know someone that probably would, but the first sentence of the job description should state that anyone who volunteers for the job should not be considered.

Social sanctions, which in this case would involve Timmy being verbally abused (picked on, GRIN) for his unfortunate habit, would, most likely, take care of the problem. Social sanctions would, most likely, induce "voluntary self-restraint." In the unlikely event Timmy persisted, it would clearly signal the need for intervention by a grup before Timmy became bully meat.

Unfortunately, social sanctions don't work nearly as well among allegedly well-adjusted grups on the playground commonly referred to as the real world. I understand that we've lost a good deal of our cultural consensus (I speak only of American culture, mine is a somewhat parochial life). We need to find a way to socially sanction the ill-mannered.

Shouldn't good manners in our current environment be more important than ever? If we're all busy doing our own thing, if we're to all be non-judgemental, non-haters, don't we at least need good manners to keep from killing each other? Shouldn't good manners be a virtue? I'm not talking about using the correct fork, I'm talking about minimizing friction in everyday encounters. Why are there don't be a hater t-shirts but not "Don't be Ill-mannered" t-shirts?

After rereading Temperance (Part One), and the above, it's dawned on me that my Marie-Louise, my beautiful muse, has a method to her madness. Last week I explored the importance of society treading lightly and thinking heavily before imposing its version of temperance upon its members via the force of law. Beware the law of unintended consequences.

Above, I discuss judiciously applied social sanctions. This is a way to encourage temperance without using the hammer of the force of law. Anything goes is not the way to go. We need social sanctions lest we all degenerate into bigfeets (see glossary).

[Gentlereaders -- for the record, the story that I recently unmercifully pummeled a loud talker with a cell phone in a tiny, overheated waiting room at doctor's office is completely untrue. I practiced good manners (and temperance) by informing the receptionist where she could find me and fled to another room.] 

And now some thoughts on temperance -- moderation or self-restraint -- as a virtue applied by an individual to their own lives

[Finally! sez Dana.]

People who practice one of the more traditional organized religions are provided with a framework that includes ethical/moral rules and guidelines that by their nature prescribe moderation and self-restraint. Gray areas to be clarified via prayer and/or clergy.

The rest of us must draw our own lines. I maintain that in the practice of this and all virtues, cardinal and otherwise, that 98.39% of the time (non-psychotic) H. sapien grups know what behavior is virtuous. Callowyutes, starting at about the age of seven, usually know as well, but only 78.39% of the time which is why they need clear-eyed grups to supervise them carefully.

[Iggy opens his mouth to speak, I cut him off.]

I know what you're going to say, I say, or rather, what you're going to ask. Why should you, or anyone for that matter, practice temperance? Why not eat an entire box of girl scout cookies in one sitting? especially thin mints.

The answer is, sometimes you should, mostly, you shouldn't.

Occasionally, tossing temperance out the window and consuming an entire box of GS cookies in one sitting is just what the physician prescribed. If you've been too self(or other)-disciplined, or, self(or other)-disciplined for too long, an imbalance in the universe is created. Everything contains/creates its opposite. This is the nature of reality, there's no white without black and change is the only constant.

If you love and enjoy thin mints (or anything else) but never, ever, eat them because you're fanatically devoted to eating low carb (or any of a hundred other reasons), the universe, seeking to restore balance before there's an explosion, will send you a steady stream of revenue seeking girl scouts.

It doesn't matter if it takes two cookies or two sleeves of cookies to defuse the bomb and restore balance.

However, if you decide to embrace the life of a libertine and start purchasing your thin mints by the case (FYI, Keebler Grasshoppers are even better than what the GSs offer) this will also create a disturbance in the force.

Besides the obvious downside, rapid and significant weight gain, one will discover the truth about libertinism -- repeated indulgence is boring. Sorry stickies, reality is self-regulating in that devoting one's life to the perpetual pursuit of pleasure, without multiple interludes of work and boredom, is like listening to a song consisting of one uninterrupted note.

To keep the pleasure perpetually percolating requires ever increasing levels of stimulation and life on Earth only provides so many levels before you hit your head on the ceiling. Beyond this lies madness and/or addiction.

Temperance, will help to keep you from killing yourself (accidentally or otherwise). Temperance, will help to keep you from being killed by one of the other kids on the playground. Poppa loves you.

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.










 






































Saturday, March 25, 2017

Temperance (Part One)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars
Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 
Iggy -- Designated Sticky
Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)


Dear (Eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies,

Wikipedia: "Temperance is defined as moderation or voluntary self-restraint."

"Moderation in all things," Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Temperance, not a commonly used word these days, is the next cardinal (hinge) virtue I wish to explore. I think I mentioned (in some form, I'm too lazy to look it up) a few columns back that, "The term cardinal comes from the Latin cardo (hinge); the cardinal virtues are so called because they are regarded as the basic virtues required for a virtuous life." -Wikipedia again. All virtues hinge on the cardinal virtues.

If I didn't, I just did. If I did, consider yourself refreshed, or oriented if you just got here. (Where have you been? I've been at this since 7/15 @ theflyoverlandcrank.com. No wonder I've yet to go viral...)

On the rare occasion I do encounter the word temperance, the first thing I think of is The Woman's Christian Temperance Union (WCTU, I've no idea why).

[Iggy, my imaginary grandsticky, speaks. Poppa, like, what's this WCTU thing? Yes, enlighten us, please, you know you want to, Sez Dana, imaginary gentlereader, somewhat sarcastically I note. Marie-Louise, my beautiful muse, scratches my back reassuringly, so I know I'm on the right path.]

The WCTU, founded in the late 1800's, was is (they still exist) part of the temperance movement, folks who refrain from the use of alcohol and other recreational pharmaceuticals and support the gummits and The Gummit restricting the use of, or the banning of, same.

The WCTU, quite influential at one time, is one of the reasons the USA completely prohibited the use of alcohol, via the 18th amendment, from 1920 to 1933.

The temperance movement has religilous (I know it's misspelled, far be it from me to not opt for the lame joke) roots. Generally, they don't counsel moderation in the use of recreational pharmaceuticals, they promote abstinence, not using them at all. Which should surprise no one. And of course, there's much to be said for personally deciding to not drink or drug and advising others to do the same.

Abstinence isn't technically moderation. But if you're an alcoholic or a drug addict it's the only virtuous/rational choice. Your excessive drinking or drugging will not only eventually kill you, it's likely to literally/figuratively kill or maim plenty of other kids on the playground along the way. Abstinence, for you, is temperance (voluntary self-restraint), not to mention, the prudent thing to do.

BIG BUT.

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions," Saint Bernard of Clairvaux (maybe...).

The good ladies of the WCTU, concerned with all the victims of substance abuse, not just the abuser, fought for, and succeeded in, (temporarily) banning alcohol. The WCTU defines temperance as "moderation in all things healthful; total abstinence from all things harmful." Not a bad personal philosophy.

However, when you start banning the other kids on the playground from this, that, and the other behavior, even with the best of intentions, things can get ugly, fast. Intemperately imposing your, or your religion's, rules and regs on all the other kids, even with the best of intentions, may make things worse by creating new problems.

While sharing the playground requires rules and grups (the rule of law), to ensure the kids have maximum fun (liberty --  and all that founding father's shtuff) you need just enough rules and grups.

 Wikipedia: "Temperance is defined as moderation or voluntary self-restraint."
"Moderation in all things," Ralph Waldo Emerson.

The rule of law + (restrained by) temperance = maximum freedom, but, maximum freedom - (unrestrained by) temperance = chaos.

A happy/healthy playground requires the rule of law (and morality, and good manners, and tolerance, and patience, and security, and...). And the drawing of fine lines. 

That is, deciding on what sorts of behavior we all agree should be punished, and how, in spite of the fact H. sapiens have always done it/will continue to do it anyway. 

That is, refraining from punishing behavior that, while we may punish ourselves for it, or believe that our God will, H. sapiens have always done it/will continue to do it anyway.

Fine lines, but clearly drawn, well thought out lines. For example, I rarely drink, and I don't care much for drunks. I also don't want my grandstickies and great-grandstickies to be drunks. However, even once I become the King of America, I won't ban alcohol, for people 21 or older.

Because I don't care if they (or anyone else) enjoy a drink once in awhile. I don't care if they (or anyone else) occasionally gets drunk, as long as they don't drink and drive. Because I'm a sexy seasoned citizen (see glossary) and I know shtuff.

I know that while murder should be prohibited, for what should be (hopefully) obvious reasons. I also know about the law of unexpected consequences. I know that prohibiting the use of alcohol (and all sorts of things) created a profitable black market for thugs and turned ordinary folks into criminals. I know that The Gummit spent a lot of time, money, and lives trying to stop something that can't be stopped. I know...

[Dana: Yeah? well, there's always gonna' be murderers and...]

Fine lines, clearly drawn. Some things should be prohibited, some things should be regulated, everything else should be tolerated (but not necessarily socially sanctioned). All three categories require consideration of the law of unintended consequences and the fact that ours is a nation designed primarily to maximize liberty (not democracy, but that's another column).

[Iggy, who looks puzzled, speaks: Um, like, I don't get it, Poppa. I thought temperance meant something like not eating a whole box of Girl Scout cookies at one time? Yeah, and what the hell does socially sanctioned mean? adds Dana.]

It does, sticky one, it does, but my style is edited stream of consciousness. Inhale -- Once I got rolling on the liberty v. forcing other people to adopt one's version of temperance via force of law, and, the law of unexpected consequences, and, social sanctions (which, I'm not going to get into, because, it's time to go and I'll save that for part two, whereupon, I will also address the question you posed that made use of your excellent Girl Scout cookie analogy) it became obvious that temperance would require a part two -- breathe. Poppa loves you.

[Iggy: Oh.  Dana: Sheesh.  Marie-Louise: scratch, scratch]

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.


































Saturday, March 18, 2017

The State of the Zeitgeist

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars
Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 
Iggy -- Designated Sticky
Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)


Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies,

We interrupt our series on the cardinal virtues to bring you this zeitgeist update.

The Donald's reality show has been running for a couple of months now -- all day, every day. There's no getting away from it unless you're a self-sufficient prepper living in the wilderness with a broken short-wave radio.

"All politics is theater." I went a-googlin' and couldn't discover anyone to attribute this to, but it's a very commonly used expression and it rings true to me. I think the expression requires updating to all politics is showbiz. The word showbiz more accurately expresses the spirit of our time. Showbiz implies cutting edge flash and fakery, with a tinge of sleaze. The word theater is too dignified.

[Warning: possible excessive use of metaphors ahead.]

P-T., (pre-Trump) American politics was, and by many folks still is, viewed as follows. Politics is hardball (again, unattributable) and most politicians can't be trusted, it's the nature of the beast. However, it's only the truly corrupt ones, the ones that are only in it for the money/power, that are a real threat.

The rest are sausage makers, and while you might love sausage, particularly the All-American hot dog, most of us wouldn't want to take a tour of, much less work in, a slaughterhouse -- but someone's got to make the sausage.

We're not naive. We understand that a sausage maker is going to get some blood on their hands. Sausage making (and democracy) is messy. We're cool with that, as long as the butcher doesn't add too much fat and keeps his thumb off the scale.

The blood, or at least enough of it, will come out in the wash, that is, at election time. Also, we pay for full-time, lean and hungry, impartial investigators, the fourth estate (what we used to call the press, more commonly now referred to as the media), to monitor the sausage makers, 24 x 7 x 365.25.

At election time, proud, well-informed Americans, meticulously prepared by a world-class education system, upon which we lavish an ever increasing amount of money, carefully and rationally choose the best man person for the job.

In my semi-humble opinion, the three paragraphs after the metaphor warning above, are accurate. After that, not so much. The media, in general (like politicians, in general), are viewed unfavorably by the public for a reason. Many of us find many of them to be biased and/or condescending. Many of us find many of them to be ratings and profits chasing infotainers.

As to why people keep (re)electing the wrong people, that is, anyone you wouldn't vote for, the reasons are legion. Schools are an easy target since overall they seem to keep getting worse. "There's too much money in politics!" is a perennial favorite. That's a good one since it enables us to not only demonize the candidate we don't like, we can also demonize the source of their money.

You may have indeed gone to a crappy grade/high school. You may have gone deeply into debt to attend a crappy college. Even if it wasn't crappy, there's a very good chance you picked the wrong major. Hey, you were 18, you didn't know, well, crap. Your parental units telling you that you would regret your choice later convinced you that you had made the right choice.

Man... if you knew then what you know now. Wouldacouldashoulda. You know, if...

BIG BUT.

Fact is, many people are not all that well informed. Fact is, many most people, most of the time, decide (emotionally, intuitively) first, rationalize later. Gut first, brain later. Not you and I, of course, but most people. This is bleeding edge science,

Anyway, not being well informed can be the most rational course of action. You constantly feel overwhelmed and exhausted because  _______ , and there ain't much you can do about that right now. And statistically speaking, your opinion/vote is insignificant anyway.

The Donald knows this. The Donald is the P.T. Barnum ("Without promotion, something terrible happens... nothing!") of politics. The Donald's not so secret secret is that he speaks directly to your heart, not your brain. Your heart may reject him, but it can't ignore him. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.

Who do you know that's indifferent to the Donald?

[Dana, my imaginary gentlereader, speaks. Oh yeah, what about Obama? He...]

Barack "no drama" Obama was elected to be the POTUS in spite of having less executive experience than a convenience store manager (not an easy job by the way) because the American people calmly and rationally considered his carefully thought out and logically presented positions and made their choice, right?

Bonkercockie!  

The housing bubble exploded and America was knocked on its ass. Some people are still trying to get up. Iraq was a sorta/kinda win but Afghanistan wasn't/still isn't and many were wondering/are wondering if both had been a bloody and expensive mistake. A frenzy of finger-pointing broke out (that's still going on) and Mr. hope and change could, and did, blame everything that's wrong on planet Earth on Dubya. And continued to do so, years after Dubya moved back to Texas and picked up a paint brush.

So America voted for the other major party, and not the party that offered up John McCain who also had a very thin resume. Another professional politician, with decades of experience -- who had also never actually run, anything. If H. sapiens make rational decisions, why is the phrase, "I voted for the lesser of two evils" so commonly used? Is this the best a rational people can do?

Which is why, when I become king, only former state governors will be permitted to run for president. I know it sounds harsh, but it's for your own (irrational, emotional) good.

Now, if you still think that H. sapiens are rational creatures, consider the following. I'm not smart enough to have figured out that we're subject to what I call gut first, brain later on my own. I simply read about the opinions and discoveries of other people. I particularly credit Jonathan Haidt and Scott Adams.

If I'm aware that the Donald's not so secret secret is his gift for going straight for the gut because that's how you actually influence people to do what you want them to do (how they vote, for example). And if I'm aware that the Donald's often (seemingly) irrational statements, tweets, etc. are part of his game, then surely the highly educated, highly experienced, worldly-wise, cynical media have figured this out as well.

And yet... Instead of pointing out the game to the public when he says something outrageous or crazy, instead of pointing out he's a master of emotional manipulation, most can't help but jump on the bait like starving jackals.

"OMG! how could he say such an obviously untrue/crazy/ignorant/etc. thing? We've done a fact check and... "

Who is acting rationally? Who keeps reacting irrationally? Poppa loves you.

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.