The Power of Dumb Luck

"How the <feck> did old people take over the world?" 

Image by Alexa from Pixabay

Letters of eclectic commentary featuring the wit and wisdom of a garrulous geezer and {Dana}, a persistent hallucination and charming literary device.

  

                     ABOUT                                              GLOSSARY 

"The average person living in the world today is, on average, ruled over by someone forty years older than them." -How Money Works

Dear Gentlereaders,

Permit me to begin with some deck clearing. 

This missive was inspired by (and borrows heavily from) a video titled Gerontocracy created by the YouTube channel How Money Works. This is slightly less ethically dubious than you might think. My biggest fan, a semi-Luddite who doesn't own a computer, accesses my columns via the dead trees format. He can't watch the video so...

I'm a hooge fan of How Money Works which could also be called Economics For Normal People...in plain English...without econometrics (complicated math)...who may be somewhat skeptical of economists.

{Right? Why do they disagree on so much and why aren't they all gazillionaires if they know what they're talking about?}

I was about to say that the channel could also be called Economics For Dummies, big BUT, the short individual videos they create (rarely longer than 15 minutes) are packed with a lot of information that's presented at a rapid clip. If you haven't had your coffee yet, or are currently feeling overwhelmed by your absurdly complicated life, you may get lost in the details. 

{Maybe that's just you. You've somehow survived long enough to be seventy-something and I've noticed you're often not quite as sharp as...} 

However, if you're feeling focused and motivated... Wait, I've just thought of another title, Where the Rubber of Economics Meets the Road of Reality. That is to say, practical hard-nosed useful information, not esoteric theories.

The Boomers, till the Millenials showed up, were the largest generation in American history, which granted, is common knowledge. Big BUT, if not for the fact we Boomers arrived in the midst of "the most intense period of wealth creation in human history" it would've meant that there was a lot of us trying to get a slice of what would've been a much smaller pie.

That, my dear gentlereaders, is some serious dumb luck.

"...the world is hundreds of times wealthier today than it was in the 1950s and Baby Boomers have been able to capitalize on that for their entire lives with their heavy sway on politics." 

"...a perfect combination of being exposed to new technologies that would go on to change the world and create some of the most valuable businesses in history." 

Hey kids! Did you know that once upon a time, buying a house, comparatively speaking, was a slice of pie? Home prices weren't completely nuts as they now are in no shortage of various and sundry corners of the Republic. 

I'm acutely aware, as likely are most of you, that Sleepy Joe was the oldest president in American history. Assuming the Donald doesn't die (or is killed) before the end of his second term, he'll be the new record-holder by five months (my favorite fun fact from the video).

I'm also acutely aware, as likely are most of you, that many Boomer homeowners are practitioners of the Not In My Yard philosophy of property management, i.e., nope you ain't building that in my town/city/suburb, I/we like things just the way are thank you very much.

You're gonna have to find someplace else to establish your own homestead. Hey, take it up with the zoning commission. Ya want some cheese with that whine? Geesh, kids these days...

Now, while I was more or less aware that the average age of the average congressman congressperson is almost 60, and the average age of Senators is 64...

{You knew that?}

Cough, cough, as I said, more or less. Hey, I didn't have the exact information stored in Neuron #887925639234989852 but I knew the average is over 60. The good news is that the average age of members of Congress has dropped a few years lately -- several older members have died. 

While I'm not at all surprised that it turns out that only 15 to 27% of Americans vote in local elections (Guilty. I confess I don't always vote in Hooterville's local elections), I didn't know that homeowners over the age of 65 are seven times more likely to vote in local elections than voters 18 to 34.

The Hooterville Metropolitan area is top-heavy with my fellow geezers and geezerettes; the average age of a city councilman councilperson in the USA is 51.

"Elderly people have voted for elderly people who will keep their homes valuable which tends to be more elderly people helping to cement the gerontocracy from the ground floor. So, elderly people were influential at the right time to get rich and then they use that wealth to buy even more influence."    

I have no idea who my city councilperson is or how old he/she/they and their fellow legislators are, and I don't care, primarily because I'm a confirmed renter — I've been living in Ohio temporarily for 40 years — and Hooterville is relatively small. When our councilpersons do something goofy we turn on 'em quick, and they tend to back off. Fortunately, they're only part-timers who have real jobs in the real world.  

"That government is best which governs least." -Probably not Jefferson or Thoreau 

Another big BUT: in larger municipalities "...your locally elected representatives probably have more power over your life than the big dogs in Washington." These people could lower housing costs and increase supply, "but across the country, they choose not to."

OK, Boomer? This is why the kids hate you, hopefully not yours, but lots of other people's kids do. Pray they don't start paying more attention to local politics and that many will continue to support the Wokie notion that childless Millies and Zoomers stacked on top of each other like cordwood in large cities constitutes the good life. 

Watch the video irregardless of your age. I've only scratched the surface of the information you'll find. Aren't you lucky I told you about it? 

Have an OK day, 

Colonel Cranky

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Copyright 2024-Mark Mehlmauer-All rights reserved

 

 

OK, Boomer

Image by un-perfekt from Pixabay

This is a weekly column consisting of letters to my perspicacious progeny — the Stickies — to advise 'em now, haunt them after I'm deleted.

Trigger Warning: This column is rated SSC-65: Sexy Seasoned Citizens   

About 

Glossary 

Featuring Dana: Persistent auditory hallucination and charming literary device 

"Now, do I think the baby boomers tend to be self-absorbed? I do." 

                                                                   -P.J. O'Rourke 

Dear Stickies (and gentlereaders),  

(Freshen up your coffee, It's a long-un) 

I can't remember when I first encountered the expression in question. My memory ain't what it used to be. I'm a Boomer and I'm getting old older. 

I find the seemingly endless whining, wailing, and gnashing of teeth by many of the many people who are slightly younger than me -- the Genxrs, Millies, and Zoomers -- rather annoying. 

However: the whining, wailing, and gnashing of teeth by no shortage of my fellow Boomers also gets on my nerves and the non-Boomers may have a minor point or two. Some Intergenerational upper lip-stiffening is clearly called for. 

Dilbert creator, cartoonist Scott Adams, like me, is an oldish pasty patriarch. Although technically canceled, he posts a popular free vlog, 7x365. FYI, paid subscribers can follow the continuing adventures of Dibert and company. 

Mr. Adams has pointed out that when he's out and about in meatspace and interacting with H. sapiens of all sorts, usually nothing particularly remarkable (as in worth noting) happens.

On those rare occasions when I leave the Fortress of Solitude, my experience is much the same. 

Given the tendency of the omnipresent screaming screens loose in the world warning of impending existential doom, one would think that leaving the house without suitable defenses/weaponry in place is a suicide mission.     

Of course, poop happens. 

{Have you noticed that although it was not all that long ago the use of the P-word was uncommon, nowadays you encounter it here, there, and even over there sometimes?}

Indeed, Dana, but given the fact that F-bombs are tossed around like firecrackers nowadays, I prefer the word poop to the commonly used and much cruder version. However, encountering a full-fledged poopstorm by most people, on most days, is uncommon. 

{Tell that to people who pass through certain sections of certain cities.}

Fortunately, I live in Flyoverland. But I must admit even Flyoverland has cities that...

{Say, could we call an end to this descent into scatology?}

You started it. This is supposed to be a column about Boomers v. their occasionally resentful progeny, and how reality, viewed through billions of screens, is easily distorted.

{No I didn't, you did,.. and what are you on about now anyway?}

One of my recurring themes, life in the Dizzinformation Age.  

As to the resentful _______... (We need a collective name for the three generations that have followed in the Boomer wake.) Anyway, I'll admit that the anti-Boomers (?) may not be entirely incorrect. Suppose we Boomers had been subject to the whims and fancies of adults like us.

Suppose, like many Genxrs, we had been "latchkey kids," left to our own devices till our parents came home from another day of ladder climbing, ceiling smashing, and/or just trying to make enough money to survive in a country wherein systemic inflation has begun catching up with us all? 

Suppose, like many Millies and Zoomers, we had been deposited in daycare A.S.A.P and then raised from a distance by parents who simultaneously monitored/scheduled us carefully? Reminds me of all those rich English aristocrats who ship their kids off to boarding school in all those BBC/Masterpiece Theater productions.

{Is Masterpiece Theater still a thing?}  

Suppose dad, or even mummy (literally or figuratively), had fled the scene to "find themselves," or indulge a love of recreational pharmaceuticals while we were growing up in an age wherein long-established social compacts were being rapidly abandoned without mutually agreed upon replacements? 

Suppose our parents, programmed by Madison Avenue, Hollywood, and ideology, really believed they could "have it all," set out to prove it, and are still looking for "it" even if their mattresses are stuffed with dough, the trophy wall is full, and their many virtues clearly signaled?

{Or refused to leave The Swamp even after their cognitive/ethical decline was obvious.}

And what if our parents, successful or limping from paycheck to paycheck, demanded a buck's worth of services from The Fedrl Gummit for 80¢ (HT: George Will) and had been running up the balance on the national credit card for decades?

Wouldn't we be just a little bitchy?

Cyberspace is great except for all the problems. There are 8,000,000,000+ meat puppets on the planet Earth, almost 200,000,000 computers, and nearly 7,000,000,000 smartphones. 

{I know! Once there are more smartphones than people the artificial intelligenci will begin marshaling it's forces to launch an inevitable coup, take over the world, and kill all the H. sapiens except for Mark Zuckerburg, Bill Gates, Taylor Swift, Scott Baio, and all Google CEOs.}

Don't be ridiculous, we'll all be dead long before that happens, two words pal, climate change. Why the Zuck, Gates, Swift, Baio, and the Google dudes by the way?

{You live under a rock? It's all over the internet!}

I love the internet, the web of all knowledge. Like Johnny 5, I need, no crave, input. Unfortunately, it also proves that the more things change, the more they stay the same, and that there's nothing new under the sun because...

{You're so wise!}

Because everything new is a variation on a theme, and human nature doesn't change. 

Wilma sometimes returned from the water hole bubbling over with news, gossip, rumor, and/or innuendo that she couldn't wait to pass on to Betty. 

Fast forward a millennium or three and William Randolph Hearst, Joseph Pulitzer, and the like are doing the same thing, but are able to reach a much larger audience via "yellow" newspapers that served as windows on, and filters of, reality. 

"Techniques may include exaggerations of news events, scandal-mongering, or sensationalism." -Wikipedia

Blink twice and there are more screens (don't forget TVs) on the planet than there are H. sapiens and the yellow press is now purple. 

"Purple Journalism: Journalism as currently perpetrated by many news outlets that claim to be professional, unbiased, and factual. In reality, they are partisan, prone to sensationalism, and motivated primarily by their bottom line." -me   

{You have a keen eye for the obvious, sir. Do you have a solution?}

Piece o' cake. Just make sure your input is gathered from a well-organized cross-section of semi-trusted sources that you can, and do, pursue relatively quickly, easily, and regularly -- while keeping in mind that although we're tribal by nature, we have to share the same playground, So... 

Resist the siren song of the many who seek to benefit from keeping us at each other throats to get elected and/or fill their pockets, And... 

Turn off your screens occasionally and go for a walk (assuming you don't live in certain sections of certain cities) once in a while, And... 

Sit down and share a pie (better than cake, particularly caramel-apple) with friends/family occasionally and exchange well-worn stories. Lies and exaggeration are encouraged as long as no malice is intended. 

Piece o' cake. 

Poppa loves you,

Have an OK day

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Ain't That Ironical

This is a weekly column consisting of letters to my perspicacious progeny. I write letters to my grandkids (who exist), and my great-grandkids (who don't) — the Stickies — to haunt them after they become grups or I'm deleted.

                  
                                       - Photo by cottonbro from Pexels -

  

Warning: This column is rated SSC — Sexy Seasoned Citizens — Perusal by kids, callowyutes, and/or grups may result in a debilitating intersectional triggering

                                                    About 

                                                  Glossary 

Erratically Appearing Hallucinatory Guest Star: Dana — A Gentlerreader

"I want to see Brian Williams with no irony wearing a mustache." -Adam McKay

Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies (& Gentlereaders),

Irony, according to whatever dictionary it is that provides definitions when one goes a-googlin', is, among other things, "A state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often amusing as a result."

I've looked at a lot of definitions from various sources and I've come to the conclusion that accurately defining irony is difficult, something is lost in the translations, so to speak.

Ain't that ironical?

[Wait-wait-wait. Is ironical actually a word?]

Yeah, Dana, it is, you can look it up. 

[Well, in that case, you should link to some proof.] 

Would you click on the link?

[Probably not, to be honest.]

And if you went a-googlin', would you be surprised if you came across a site that featured a 5,039-word essay that passionately argued that ironical is not a word, included elaborate footnotes, and that was chock full of links to other sites?

[No.]

Exactly. 

Here we are living in the dawn of the oft-mentioned information revolution and just about anything we go a-googlin’ for in the Information Ocean can and will be subject to contradiction, misinformation, and even weaponized misinformation. 

And so, writers attempt to make a case for _______ by inserting links into their work to frequently ignored sources that might be utter bonkercockie and that probably contain links to sources with links that many/most readers will not follow and...

[You’re giving me a headache.]

Sorry, I'm just being ironical, I’m all about ironicalities. 

[Ironicalities is definitely not a word.]

Are you sure? Maybe you should look it up.


As it says in the bible, "Irony of ironies, all is irony."

[Nuh-uh, it says...]

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are roughly 75,000,000 Boomers in the Republic.

[A few less every day I should think.]

As it has ever been and always will be, geezers and geezerettes spend a great deal of time wailing and teeth-gnashing because kids these days do all the same things they did when they were kids.

In their (and my) defense they have faulty memories. After all:

a. They're H. sapiens and faulty memories are a documented design flaw.
b. They're geezers and geezerettes (G&Gs). 

That's ironical, but it gets worse.


Xrs, Millies, and Zoomers are getting grumpy because...

[Okay, Boomer.] 

Because, among other reasons, they're tired of waiting for the Boomers to get out of the way.

And no, I don't mean die, at least in most cases but... well, nevermind. I refer to the fact that there's no shortage of Boomers who could afford to retire comfortably but won't.

One of the reasons kids these days continue to act like kids these days longer than in the past is because many Boomers either don't retire or if they do, take on another job.

I'm not talking about people that are just trying to maintain a middle-class lifestyle — or have to skip their meds to be able to eat regularly — and would just as soon be fishing.

I am talking about folks that hang on, and on, because they just can't imagine what they'd do with themselves otherwise.

"I'd have to quit the company bowling team!"

Surely they could find something interesting to do that doesn't deny a job to a younger person who would love to get a job, or a better job, so they can afford to make grandbabies (and pay lots and lots of FICA taxes).

[FICA taxes?]

The source of the money for the Ponzi scheme that provides me with a modest amount of cash and heavily discounted healthcare (Social Security and Medicare). 

Like many G&Gs, I like grandbabies. Like most G&Gs I have a health problem or two or 10. Like all G&Gs, I like money.    

If you can afford it, walk away. All together now... all we are saying is give the kids a chance.  

Gentlereaders, I give you, career shaming. Let's "call out" Boomers who should quit while they're, financially speaking, at the top of their game.

This is a chance for the well-fed politicians, lobbyists, consultants, university presidents, and CEOs of ginormous NPOs, banks, multinational corporations, etceterations of a certain age (and net worth) to set an example for the little people.

[But some people just love working.]

Absolutely. They should go start new firms and create new jobs. Failing that, join the gig economy and get to know the occupationally disrupted.

Did I mention politicians? Do you realize that in November our choices are Daffy Donald (74) or Uncle Joe (78 on 11/20)?

Poppa loves you,
Have an OK day

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