Users

                                 Larry and Sergey and Eric — Oh My!

                                 Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

This is a weekly column consisting of letters to my perspicacious progeny. I write letters to my grandkids and my great-grandkids — the Stickies — to advise them and haunt them after they become grups or I'm deleted.

Warning: This column is rated SSC — Sexy Seasoned Citizens — Perusal by kids, callowyutes, and/or grups may result in a debilitating intersectional triggering

About 

Glossary 

Erratically Appearing Hallucinatory Guest Star: Dana — A Gentlerreader

"When I showed up, I thought this was the stupidest rule ever, because there's no book about evil except maybe, you know, the Bible or something." -Eric Schmidt, former chairman/CEO of the Goog — now a (technically) married international playboy — commenting on the Goog's now-defunct rule, Don't be evil  

Dear (eventual) Grandstickies and Great-Grandstickies (and Gentlereaders),

Recently, noticing a marked increase in advertising when I'm watching YouTube I decided to complain — not that I expected this would accomplish anything beyond making me feel better for a half a minute or so. 

[Are you aware that for 12 bucks a month YouTube will supply you with unlimited, ad-free content?]

Well, yeah, but...

[Are you aware of the fact that the H. sapiens that provide YouTubes content get a cut of the advertising revenue and/or a cut from the subscription fee?]

Well, yeah, but...

[And I know for a fact you're aware that a lot of content providers post content out of love for said content, or are just trying to promote their own creative efforts and don't expect to make any money from YouTube.]

I will not only stipulate to all of the above I will admit that I could write an entire column devoted to everything I love about YouTube. 

After all, it's not only possible to watch cute kitty videos, it's also possible to pull up talks by and interviews of scientists and public intellectuals in every field, as well as the music of musical giants in every genre, living and dead.

[Geez... So what's your problem, Sparky?]   

The Goog's contempt for "users." 

"There are only two industries that call their customers 'users': illegal drugs and software." -Edward Tufte

Now, just for fun, imagine some old geezer watching/listening to Coffee With Scott Adams which is usually about an hour-long with a new episode available every day.

Our hero is in the midst of a series of physical therapist prescribed exercises to relieve his spinal stenosis, as well as some other exercises, while listening to Mr. Adam's observations on life in these United States (HT: Reader's Digest) at a playback speed of 1.25 or even 1.5 as Mr. Adam's tends to ramble. 

Imagine our hero's reaction when he's lying on his back and for whatever algorithmically determined reason, the adverts are coming more frequently and are longer than usual and he doesn't want to keep getting up to click through them. 

[Imagine that our cowardly "hero" keeps postponing back surgery because of all the people he knows that back surgery did nothing for, or even made worse, and who's too cheap to pay for ad-free YouTube.]    

Imagine our hero, who worked full-time mostly at physically demanding jobs for 45 years or so and is scraping by on an embarrassingly humble fixed income decides that for the very first time he's going to complain to YouTube. 

YouTube, if you're unaware, is owned by (insert ominous music here) — the Goog. 

It can't be done. 

[Wait-wait-wait. I know for a fact you went looking and there are all sorts of ways to complain about...]

Only the sorts of things the Goog permits you to complain about. Try it my dear gentlereaders. You'll be shunted into categories of the Goog's choosing and none of these categories will enable you to complain about too much advertising. 

[You know... Given your, um, advancing age, and the fact that you have little patience for what amounts to having to take a class to accomplish...]

What should be simple to accomplish...

[Perhaps, um, it's you, and...]

I repeat, what  should  be  simple  to  accomplish. 

Particularly in light of the fact that I'm old enough to know there's no such thing as a free lunch, that I'm the product, and that the Goog gets a little richer and more powerful every day by peering over my shoulder and selling my, nay everyone's data, to the highest bidder.

[Nay?] 

Yea. 

[Are you done? Do you feel better yet?]  

I do feel a little better, yes, but not having hit my word limit yet I'm not quite done. 

On an unrelated note...

America, the Harris/Biden campaign is refusing to answer an existentially important question. If elected, and if they can persuade our corrupt and dysfunctional Congress to go along, are they prepared to destroy the Republic?

[Destroy the Republic? All they're saying is that it's not fair, due to historical serendipitousness, that we might soon have a Supreme Court top-heavy with sticks in the mud that insist on interpreting the constitution literally instead of creatively so...] 

So that if Krafty Kamala/Uncle Joe is in charge and the Dems get control of the Senate they can appoint as many like-minded Supremes with lifetime appointments as needed to create a mini House of Lords to save us from ourselves. 

[Well, there's nothing in that moldy old constitution that says they can't so...]

So the hell with that pesky checks and balances thing, the end justifies the means, right? What's the worst that could happen?

Poppa loves you,
Have an OK day

Free bonus content! Quotations from Chairman Eric. Sample: "I actually think most people don't want Google to answer their questions. They want Google to tell them what they should be doing next."

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YouTube Monetizes YouTube

-Image by Pete Linforth from Pixabay-

This is a weekly column consisting of letters to my perspicacious progeny. I write letters to my grandchildren (who exist), and my great-grandchildren (who don't) — the Stickies — to haunt them after they become grups or I'm deleted.

                  
Warning: This column is rated SSC — Sexy Seasoned Citizens — Perusal by kids, callowyutes, and/or grups may result in a debilitating intersectional triggering

                                                  Glossary  

                                                    About

Erratically Appearing Hallucinatory Guest Star: Dana — A Gentlerreader

"YouTube is the hippest network, and they abuse copyright right and left." 
                                                                                           -Prince


Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies (& Gentlereaders),

From what I can tell from my exhaustive research—my normal 3 to 5 minutes of in-depth web surfing via YouTube's owner, the Goog—YouTube starting monetizing YouTube sometime back in 2018.

I don't know if they saved, um, demographically and economically challenged areas of the USA like mine till now or they just got tired of me rejecting their offer to sign me up for YouTube premium.

Regardless, in the good old days, having to watch a commercial for a few seconds before I could choose to opt-out seemed more than fair, in fact, downright cutting edge cool, almost woke...

X39!@GRa13$, Chief Algorithmite, YouTube Division, speaks:

"We hate to risk offending your delicate sensibilities, and once upon a time even we used to claim that 'information wants to be free' with a straight face, but would you mind taking a few seconds to determine if this advert is something you might be interested in?

We realize you're in a hurry to watch some cute kitty videos as well as all the copyrighted content posted by people claiming fair use so that they (and of course us, your benevolent supplier of free software and services) can make money from other people's work." 

Now, having lived long enough to confirm that there really is no such thing as a free lunch, I didn't even mind when they started running a single, 15-second mandatory commercial at the start of some videos.

A small price to pay for a free product.


YouTube Monetizes YouTube
Recently, adverts, often slick and professionally produced, have begun popping up at random when I'm watching something on YouTube.

I don't have a problem with advertising per se, the no free lunch thing again. While I confess to having downloaded, and use, an app from DuckDuckGo that lets me selectively block ads, I use it, well, selectively.

Being a current events junkie, freak actually, I access a bunch of carefully chosen sites on a daily basis to get my fix. On all but one, The Wall Street Journal (I pay a hefty subscription fee) I submit myself to advertising. I don't think that I'm entitled to view someone's hard work for free.

I have it set to block ads for all the random sites that I stumble on. This is because the app has made me aware that beyond the minor annoyance of ads there are potentially dozens of Botmonsters, Data Dragons, and Algorithmites (trackers) anxious to report every click and keystroke back to headquarters.

Any site that has become one of my regulars will find my blocker turned off. I know, I know, it's screaming into the wind. The sites that I leave it turned off for are gleefully hoovering up as much data as they can and selling it to the highest bidder.

But denying a bit of ad revenue to the Goog provides the illusion of privacy and control and there's a lesson to be gleaned here about getting what you're willing to pay for—real journalism created by real journalists—as opposed to what you get when you're not willing to pay anything at all.


BIG BUT
The reason I'm on about YouTube monetizing YouTube is because of the clumsy and heavy-handed way they've gone about it (unusual for the Goog I know, but still...).

Are they tone deaf? Are they oblivious? Are they trying to sell subscriptions?

A highly placed aid to X39!@GRa13$, who spoke to me on the condition that it remains anonymous, claims that at best YouTube breaks even and that the Goog would prefer it to be another big fat profit generator.

Of course, you could make an argument that given how much money the Goog makes selling our data without cutting us in that a service that breaks even is shrewd public relations.

But this column isn't about that so I won't bring it up.

[Clumsy and heavy-handed, remember? Nudge, nudge...]

Right! Thanks, Dana. The Goog is using what I call the 8-track system to randomly place ads within a given video. The logic seems to be, let's not just place more ads let's do it the most annoying way possible.

[What's the 8-track...]

Follow the link. Long story short, picture a hooge plastic box of pre-recorded music that every so often, usually in the middle of a song, pauses, makes a loud CLICK-CLICK noise and then resumes playing.

Cutting edge tech for playing music in your ride... in the late 1960s.

Fast forward (which you usually couldn't do with an 8-track player) to the late 2010s and now we have the Goog inserting commercials, at random, into a given video.

"So tell us, professor Einstein, what thought was the seed that led eventually to the theory of General Relativity, and what... "

"Hey there, I'm just driving to my new house in Palm Springs in my new Ferrari. How would you like to be as rich as me without having to leave your house?" All ya gotta do... "

The 8-track system. Hoo-boy.

Poppa loves you,
Have an OK day

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