Saturday, July 11, 2020

Winnie the Emperor Strikes Back


This is a weekly column consisting of letters to my perspicacious progeny. I write letters to my grandkids and my great-grandkids — the Stickies — to advise them and haunt them after they become grups or I'm deleted.
                  
-Image by Weibo 

Warning: This column is rated SSC — Sexy Seasoned Citizens — Perusal by kids, callowyutes, and/or grups may result in a debilitating intersectional triggering

About 

Glossary 

Erratically Appearing Hallucinatory Guest Star: Dana — A Gentlerreader

"Some foreigners with full bellies and nothing better to do engage in finger-pointing at us." -Xi Jinping 


Dear Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies (& Gentlereaders),

In case you're not familiar with what my favorite emperor (and second favorite dick-tater), China's president for life Xi Jinping (aka Xi Dada) has to do with Winnie the Pooh, clicking on this link provides an article that illustrates everything.

[Illustrates? Wouldn't explains be a better choice of words?]

No.

The article is world-class clickbait from an online magazine called MEL but... Is there an industry term for yet another progressive publication that claims it's not just another progressive publication, but mostly is?

[I've no idea but I do know that, No, was rude, and you didn't answer my question.] 

Sorry, Dana. The choice of the word illustrates was deliberate. The article includes four illustrations/photos that, um, illustrate Xi Dada's resemblance to Winnie the Pooh.

[You know, not everyone is amused by your wordplay.]

I suspect my gentlereaders are, after all, they're smarter than the a-ver-age bear.

[Whatever. By the way, who's your favorite dick-tater?]

North Korea's Supreme Leader, Kim Jong-un of course. Now there's a psychopath. He looks (and behaves) like Winnie the Pooh on serious drugs, but he may have been deleted by the webmaster in the sky, or his sister, which would make Xi Dada number two with a bullet.

[Why are you picking on Xi Dada's looks again? After all, no one's gonna mistake you for George Clooney. Are you a lookist?]

A lookist? What's a... Oh, I get it.

I think that lampooning a dick-tater who uses phrases like "capitalism with Chinese characteristics" and "one country, two systems" with a straight face puts me on the side of the angels.

God bless you, George Orwell, wherever you are.

[You're creeping up on a point... Right?]

Absabalutely. For the record, capitalism with Chinese characteristics is Newspeak (see 1984: Orwell, George) for cronyism, mercantilism, and left-wing fascism.

[Are you going to unpack that one?]

Nah. That's worth a column of its own. But the one country, two systems claim is pure bonkercockie and there's a lesson here for my Dear Grandstickies, and everyone else.


July the first marked the 23rd anniversary of the British colony of Hong Kong reverting to Chinese control. The Chinese Gummit, which had promised not to mess with Hong Kong for fifty years — one country, two systems — began messing almost immediately.

The harder they pushed the harder the citizens of Hong Kong pushed back with pro-democracy protests.

On June 30th at approximately 11:00 p.m., the Emperor struck back with the "Decision of the National People's Congress on Establishing and Perfecting the Legal System and Enforcement Mechanism of the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region to Maintain National Security."

Translation and bottom line: You're now officially enslaved like the rest of us. Shortly before America celebrated Independence the emperor imposed Unindependence Day in Hong Kong.


If you've been busy watching or participating in our current national pastimes —demonizing each other, setting things on fire, and/or trying to separate pandemic truth from fiction (and politicization)  — you may have taken your eye off the (Chinese) ball.

[The billionaires and millionaires of the NBA are kissing Xi Dada's bum again?]

No. The emperor and his minions now have a vaguely worded cudgel that means whatever they say it means that they can use to keep the masses in line. You can be busted and imprisoned without much in the way of due process.

[You? I know you're uncomfortable using "one" when a "you" will do but in this case shouldn't you...]

Nope. An excellent article by Emily Feng on NPRs website reports that inciting hatred against Bejing by "... a person who is not a permanent resident of the region" (that would be you, and all the other yous on the planet Earth) is now illegal.

[Wait-wait-wait. Even if you didn't make that up, how would China go about enforcing it?

I didn't make it up; you can easily look it up. I doubt Xi Dada thinks it can be enforced. I don't doubt that he/she/they thinks that in a better world he/she/they could and that with a little luck, eventually might.

[Well, Assuming, for the sake of argument that it's true, I think the United Nations should get together and tell China to get stuffed.]

Here's a couple'a quotes from an article by Chris Chang, published on the website of Taiwan News. The citizens of Taiwan, for obvious reasons, keep a weather eye on China 24x7x365.

"A total of 53 countries endorsed China's national security law for Hong Kong at the United Nations Human Rights Council in Geneva on Tuesday (June 30), many of which are dictatorships or economically tied with China." My emphasis.

"Meanwhile, 27 countries joined the UK-led condemnation of Beijing's legislation."

[Hoo-boy.]

Poppa loves you,
Have an OK day

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