Friday, November 5, 2021

"I'm Just Not Feelin' It Today"

A quotable quotes column

                                    The Pooteen, courtesy of PIXY#ORG

This is: A weekly column consisting of letters to my perspicacious progeny. I write letters to my grandkids — the Stickies — eventual selves to advise them and haunt them after they've become grups and/or I'm deleted.   

Warning: This column is rated SSC — Sexy Seasoned Citizens — Perusal by kids, callowyutes, or grups may result in an intersectional meltdown. Intended for H. sapiens who are — in the words of the late, great bon vivant, polymath, and pic-a-nic basket expert, Professor Y. Bear — "Smarter than the av-er-age bear." 

Erratically Appearing Hallucinatory Guest Star: Dana — A Gentlereader  

"You must obey the law, always, not only when they grab you by your special place." - Vladimir Putin

Dear (eventual) Grandstickies and Great-Grandstickies (and Gentlereaders),

I'm just not feelin' it today is how I'm feeling today. I try to keep a certain minimum of columns in stock lest I'm the victim of an unforeseen catastroff like... 

{Catastroff? You mean catastrophe?}

I much prefer the Elbonian spelling and pronunciation. 

Anyways, just in case I'm struck but not killed by a meteorite or a rogue satellite, or a bus, I like to have a few completed columns ready to publish lest I be held responsible for a void in the lives of my legions of regular readers.

My inventory is currently running low. Due to the supply chain crisis, I'm suffering from both word and motivation shortages. 

Also, a writer must write. Not only to maintain inventory levels but also to stave off neurosis (or worse...) and if he/she/they would rather not be stranded on an ice flow by irritated members of their freakishly large household for being an all-around jagoff. 

{Well, some writers anyway.} 

But I'm not here to defend my delicate and refined artistic sensibilities. I'm here because I've stumbled across a really cool and surprising...

{And lengthy...} 

Quote from a speech by the Pooteen, aka Vladimir Putin, the Czar of all the Russias, at a meeting of the Valdai Discussion Club, a Russian think tank, that like most things in Russia, is securely under the thumb of the Pooteen. (A tip o' the hat to VDH, aka, Dr. Victor Davis Hanson.):

The advocates of so-called 'social progress' believe they are introducing humanity to some kind of a new and better consciousness. Godspeed, hoist the flags as we say, go right ahead.

It may come as a surprise to some people, but Russia has been there already. After the 1917 revolution, the Bolsheviks, relying on the dogmas of Marx and Engels, also said that they would change existing ways and customs and not just political and economic ones, but the very notion of human morality and the foundations of a healthy society. The destruction of age-old values, religion and relations between people, up to and including the total rejection of family (we had that, too), encouragement to inform on loved ones — all this was proclaimed progress and, by the way, was widely supported around the world back then and was quite fashionable, same as today.  

I found (and subsequently verified) this quote in an essay written by VDH titled Who Eventually Won the Cold War? The subtitle tells you everything you need to know about Wokies (well-meaning and otherwise) and the essay in question: 

There's nothing like an old Bolshevik grinning that ossified American wokesters are stuck circa 1920s in the old Bolshevik Russia.

When asked if he planned on attending the latest United Nations Climate change conference Svante Thunberg replied: 

"Hell no, I am certainly not going."


Greta Thunberg's dad. 

{Ain't she the cute little climate activist you called the Joan of Arc of the new millennium?}

Harumph, you're taking my words out of context again. 

{Is that the same conference where Uncle Joe took a nap and the image/video circumnavigated the globe at lightspeed?}

I called the White House and asked about that. Jan Psaki assured me that "he was just resting his eyes." 

Anyways, I wish to apologize to Mr. Thunberg. Although I never stated it publicly (fortunately) I may have mentioned, in private conversation, that I thought Ms. Thunberg's parents, given her age and some well-known "issues" (what used to be called problems), should be charged with child abuse. 


A recent story in the Wall Street Journal, and some subsequent research, caused me to return my coveted World's Greatest Dad coffee cup.

Long story short, Greta became depressed at age 11, practically stopped eating, had to be taken out of school, and was later diagnosed with Asperger syndrome and obsessive-compulsive disorder. 

Her subsequent awokening and global fame started to turn her around.  

Mr. T. and Greta's mom, decidedly not climate activists, put their lives on hold for three years to become her personal support staff — to save Greta, not the world. 

Mom and dad went above and beyond but Greta's now 18, has moved out of the house, and her parents' lives are returning to normal. Money pours in and most of it's given away. Dad couldn't step down from running the foundation that dispenses it fast enough.

I hope she buys them coffee cups.

Poppa loves you,

Addendum: F.Y.I., lest you're unaware, the Pooteen had his eye on the prize early on. He joined the KGB (Russian secret police) right out of law school back in '75. I'm just guessing but I assume that's where he learned that killing your political opponents is the most efficient way to get them out of your way. 

{Is "lest" the word of the week? And don't 175 members of Congress have law degrees?}

Yes, and yes. Although I'm sure that the answer to your second question implies nothing of note. 

Scroll down to share this column or access previous ones. If you enjoy my work (and the fact I don't run advertisements or sell merchandise), please consider buying me a coffee via PayPal or a credit/debit card.    

Feel free to comment/like/follow/denounce/troll me via FacebookI announce my latest column every Saturday and post interesting things on other days.   



No comments:

Post a Comment

Don't demonize, compromise

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.