Hope and/or Goals (Heavenly Graces, Pt. 3)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Bloggaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above↑) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My sublime, drop-dead gorgeous muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)

"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." -Einstein


Dear (eventual) Stickies & Great-Grandstickies,

Wikipedia: "Hope is defined as a Divinely infused virtue, acts upon the will, by which one trusts, with confidence grounded on the Divine assistance, to attain life everlasting. Its opposite is the sin of despair."

"...the Hope to imagine a better machine. "...to infuse the day's work with a purpose, seeing one's labor as a glorious calling... ."

The first quote above is Wikipedia's theological definition of the Theological Virtue, Hope, one of the three Theological Virtues (or Heavenly Graces). 

The second is a secularized version of Hope, as posited by Dr. Deirdre McCloskey. Dr. M., my favorite economist, and future member (once I assume power) of King Crank's Privy Council of Perspicacious Polymaths. 

If you're new here, or even if you're not, and like me, your memory ain't what it used to be, this is the third of a series of columns about the three Theological Virtues. 

To be more specific, it's my semi-humble attempt at offering a secular version of these three particular virtues that are part of something that I was taught was a very big deal, The Seven Virtues. Of course, this was several thousand days ago in the Black & White ages, so...   

I decided to use Dr. McCloskey's quote(s) as a demonstration of how the Theological Virtues can easily be translated into secular ones in all four parts of this series of columns. I did this because they're all from an article she wrote about The Magnificent Seven applied to the marketplace, the world of business -- a notoriously secular sector. 


[Dana awakes. Nice introduction, but, um, Hope as a Virtue? I don't get it. You either have hope, or you don't, regardless of the subject in question. I stopped hoping my boss would extract his head from his bum a long time ago. On the other hand...]

She wore a glove?

[Don't be an eembaasle, and don't interrupt me with corny jokes that are even older than you are. I was going to say that on the other hand, I Hope that if I keep looking I'll find a better job. But I can't choose to be hopeful. Aren't you the one that said you can't choose to love? How can you choose to be hopeful? 

And for the record, your habit of capitalizing words that don't need capitalizing, and no shortage of your other goofy writing practices, gets on my nerves.]

For my record, my goofy writing practices are part of my eccentric charm. Also, before I forget, eembaasle (accent on the first syllable) is how a native Colombian character from the Netflix drama Narcos pronounced imbecile when I was watching it the other day. It was love at first hearing, with the word, not the character.

If any of my gentlereaders find my usage, spelling, and pronunciation of eembaasle triggers anyone I insincerely apologize. I love the sound of it for its own sake and I'd love it just as much if it were used by an Eskimo. I love it the same way I love the fact Buggs Bunny says maroon instead of moron. The way an Irish character, in a show I can't remember the name of, said eejit instead of idiot.

After all, Dana's right, you can't choose to love, or not. You do or you don't. Besides, hooplehead remains my go-to word in this category.


In Last week's column, I pointed out that love can be elevated to a Virtue when it's applied across the board in a practical, realistic fashion. When it's used as a tool to help you get along with the other kids on the playground. When you try to treat everyone on the planet the same way you'd like to be treated, even my second favorite dictator, Xi Dada.

"...we're talkin' big picture conceptualization here people. Think of Charity as love in action, applied love." -me

And, while we're kinda/sorta on the subject...

I should've also mentioned two other things. Good manners are a form of love in that they make it possible to at least try to communicate with hoopleheads without the situation immediately deteriorating into something like the lowest common denominator Infotainment that pours out of your primary and mobile rectangle (largest TV and smartphone).

Also, watch your back and don't be a sap. Masochism as a fallback position in any and all situations is not a good idea. Save it for... well, nevermind, that's really none of my business. Anyway, consider them mentioned.


Sorry, it's not you, it's me. Where was I? In last week's column... yadda, yadda, yadda... Oh! I know! As Charity (or even just good manners) is applied Love and becomes a Virtue when universally applied (as opposed to huffa-huffa, I love you, I've got to have you baby!), A Goal is applied Hope. It doesn't work as well a Love/Charity, semantically speaking, but it's close enough.

"...the Hope to imagine a better machine. "...to infuse the day's work with a purpose, seeing one's labor as a glorious calling... ."

See it? Steve Jobs, at least from what I gather (surprisingly enough we never met), was a Dick. 

[Mon Dieu!] 

Sorry Marie-Louise, none of the insults above apply, he was a genius after all... Anyways, he had a Goal, to make a bunch of existing machines better and change the world. Sure, Apple's shtuff is overpriced, and whether or not smartphones made the world better or worse is debatable, but let us not quibble. Lots of people love Apple's products. 

Also, they enable the cool kids to help boost our economy with a product that costs more than some people on the planet make in a year, while still looking down on the evil 1%, while they ignore the inconvenient truth that globally speaking if you live in America you are a member of the evil 1%. (Which helps to explain why all sorts of people would give up a body part of lesser importance to live here in spite of our evil tendencies.) 

Consider the often derided fast food joint manager ("a burger flipper with a tie in a skirt") who started on the line and whose Goal is to climb the corporate ladder so his her family can live decently and who may not even like his her job all that much. But her applied Hope, her Goal, will benefit her kids, that di... dope she's married to, and potentially, you. She busts her buns to supply you with the experience her employer (and you) Hopes you'll have so that everyone involved gets to keep their job.


Finally, consider the phrase, Hopes and dreams. Dreams are good. However, if you want a dream to come true, convert it into a Hope. Why? Hope, applied Hope, is how to make a dream come true. How? Turn your Hope into a Goal. Change the world. Be Virtuous. 

Free Bonus! A Fun Fact For No Additional Charge!  

If you have a goal, every time you execute a step towards it your body rewards you with a treat, a shot of dopamine. the happy hormone. However, once you reach your goal, this stops. This is why the buzz from reaching your goal doesn't last. You're gonna' need a lot of goals if you want to be happy. Poppa loves you.

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.

The Heavenly Graces (Part One)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Bloggaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above↑) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My sublime, drop-dead gorgeous muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)

"The system is a jury-rigged combination of the "pagan" virtues appropriate to a free male citizen of Athens...and the "Christian" virtues appropriate to a believer. -Deirdre McCloskey 

Dear (eventual) Stickies & Great-Grandstickies,

A while back I wrote a series of -- letters/columns/whatever this is -- about the four Cardinal Virtues. I promised that at some point in the future I'd explore the three Theological Virtues. The three Theological Virtues are also called the Heavenly Graces, a name I much prefer, even though I am, for lack of a better word, an agnostic (it's complicated).

"I act as if God exists." -Dr. Jordan B. Peterson

The quote above is a tease. I will have more to say about this subject, as well as much to say about Dr. Peterson, going forward. If you're curious... (Apologies to my readers that follow me via the dead trees format.)

[A technical timeout has been called by Dana. Question: Cranky one, why do you regularly capitalize things that don't need to be capitalized? In fact, you have a tendency to play fast and loose with all sorts of writing rules.]

Answer: It's my whatever this is, and at the risk of peeing off the other kids, I get to follow my rules. Fear not, I won't bore you with a list of my rules, which are, um, flexible, and vary according to context. And by the way, I like Heavenly Graces simply because it sounds... cooler, poetic (I have a license).


OK class, a let's review. The four Cardinal Virtues get their name from the Latin word cardo (hinge). There are all sorts of virtues of course, but the meme is that these four, dating back to the time of the ancient Greeks, are regarded as fundamental. Other virtues hinge on these four: Prudence, Temperance, Courage, and Justice.

The early Christian church added the three Heavenly Graces (Theological Virtues) and titled the grouping the Seven Virtues. This was how the subject was presented to me in my Catholic grade school days, as a done deal. My original motivation for bringing this subject up remains the same.

"...the reason I'm writing about the seven virtues is because it occurred to me that given the fact America, and a goodly chunk of the rest of the world, tossed the tot out with the jacuzzi water back in the 60s, perhaps we could find some guidance, and common ground, in the cardinal virtues."  -me

"The Catechism of the Catholic Church defines VIRTUE (my caps) as 'an habitual and firm disposition to do the (my emphasis) good.'" -Wikipedia

Now, while I have no intention of exploring the teachings of the Catholic Church's Catechism, I will, in the future, have a thing or two to say about "the good," you've been warned. 

Which brings us, at last, to the Heavenly Graces. You know...

[Wait,wait,wait. Dana calls another technical timeout. I'm confused, are you talkin' spiritually or secularly? If this ain't about the Catholic Church's Catechism, specifically, or say, the early Christian church generally... I mean, Heavenly Graces?] 

Oh. Good point. I should've specified early on that the Heavenly Graces can easily be given a secular spin (not that I'm the first person to try and do so). Also, back when I wrote about the Cardinal Virtues I threatened to eventually write about the Heavenly Graces, but with a secular spin. In my defense, I'm aesthetically besotted with the phrase, Heavenly Graces.

[Iggy weighs in: HUH?]

Cool, I think it sounds really, really cool. Hey, where's your, um, where's Marie-Louise?

[Getting her nails done, why?]

Never mind, listen, could you guys stop interrupting? I'm working here.

[Well excuse US your Crankesty. C'mon Iggy, let's go fire up your Xbox. 
It's a Playstation Dana.
Whatever...]


Anyways... St. Paul is credited with pointing out the importance of the, OK fine, the Theological Virtues: Faith, Hope & Charity (or Love, it depends on which translation you're into.) Aquinas is credited with linking them to the Cardinal Virtues and turning them into The Seven Virtues, that, as I mentioned, were handed to me as a package back in dark, dank and misty days of the Black and White Ages.

Aquinas said that the Theological Virtues are supplied to us by God, via grace. Thus the name Heavenly Virtues. Personally I... excuse me my lawyer's calling, I'll be right back.

[DISCLAIMER: I am not a scholar, I don't even play one on TV. I'm merely a semi-humble multipotentialite with 39 certified college credits. Any and all scholarly, and/or scholarlyish sounding statements found in this missive, or in anything written by me, should be taken with a grain of salt.]

Personally, I think that regardless of where they come from, what you call them, or whether you favor a spiritual or secular spin, they and their cardinal cousins deserve your consideration. Think of them as the philosophical version of your favorite retro band that's trying to make another comeback now that everyone's out of rehab and they've replaced the dead guy.

[WARNING: What follows is a lame joke, but one much enjoyed by the author. Please skip the next paragraph if you're an easily offended senior citizen. Sexy Seasoned Citizens are encouraged to read on.]

A new study of numerous studies has revealed that people with car radios that have every button preset to call up nothing but classic rock or "oldies" stations can easily determine approximately what year their lives stopped.


Hmm. I'm rapidly approaching 900 words already. I'd originally planned to cover at least one of the Theological Virtues here, but I'm a slave to the whims and guidance of Marie-Louise. I think that... what's that Mary-Louie?

Excuse me, I'll be right back.

INSERT TUNE THAT'S PLAYED WHILE THE CONTESTANTS WRITE DOWN THEIR ANSWER QUESTION FOR FINAL JEOPARDY, HERE.

Sorry. Deirdre McCloskey, a polymath who will be asked to serve on King Crank's Privy Council of Perspicacious Polymaths once I assume power, has written extensively (to put it mildly) on the Seven Virtues. She's just like me in that she would like the Magnificent Seven to make a comeback.

Other than that we don't have much in common. I'm an old Crank from Flyoverland with 39 certified college credits and she's Dr. Deirdre McCloskey, Distinguished Professor of Economics, History, English, and Communication at the University of Illinois at Chicago. And them's just the high points.

COMING SOON TO HOOTERVILLE! DEIRDRE & THE VIRTUES AND THE STRAIGHT OUT OF REHAB TOUR!

I offer the following quotations because what could be more secular than the application of the Heavenly Graces to the business world. Oh, and I promise to never say Mary Louie in public again.

"...Love, to take care of one's own, yes. But it is also...love to care for employees and partners and colleagues and customers and fellow citizens, to wish all of humankind well...finding human and transcendent connection in the marketplace... ."

"...Faith, to honor one's community of business. "...also the faith to build monuments to the glorious past, to sustain traditions of commerce, of learning... ."

"...the Hope to imagine a better machine. "...to infuse the days work with a purpose, seeing one's labor as a glorious calling... ."

Go and sin no more. Poppa loves you. 

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.

Temperance (Part One)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above↑) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)

Dear (Eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies,

Wikipedia: "Temperance is defined as moderation or voluntary self-restraint."

"Moderation in all things," Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Temperance, not a commonly used word these days, is the next cardinal (hinge) virtue I wish to explore. I think I mentioned (in some form, I'm too lazy to look it up) a few columns back that, "The term cardinal comes from the Latin cardo (hinge); the cardinal virtues are so called because they are regarded as the basic virtues required for a virtuous life." -Wikipedia again. All virtues hinge on the cardinal virtues.

If I didn't, I just did. If I did, consider yourself refreshed, or oriented if you just got here. (Where have you been? I've been at this since 7/15 @ theflyoverlandcrank.com. No wonder I've yet to go viral...)

On the rare occasion I do encounter the word temperance, the first thing I think of is The Woman's Christian Temperance Union (WCTU, I've no idea why).

[Iggy, my imaginary grandsticky, speaks. Poppa, like, what's this WCTU thing? Yes, enlighten us, please, you know you want to, Sez Dana, imaginary gentlereader, somewhat sarcastically I note. Marie-Louise, my beautiful muse, scratches my back reassuringly, so I know I'm on the right path.]

The WCTU, founded in the late 1800's, was is (they still exist) part of the temperance movement, folks who refrain from the use of alcohol and other recreational pharmaceuticals and support the gummits and The Gummit restricting the use of, or the banning of, same.

The WCTU, quite influential at one time, is one of the reasons the USA completely prohibited the use of alcohol, via the 18th amendment, from 1920 to 1933.

The temperance movement has religilous (I know it's misspelled, far be it from me to not opt for the lame joke) roots. Generally, they don't counsel moderation in the use of recreational pharmaceuticals, they promote abstinence, not using them at all. Which should surprise no one. And of course, there's much to be said for personally deciding to not drink or drug and advising others to do the same.

Abstinence isn't technically moderation. But if you're an alcoholic or a drug addict it's the only virtuous/rational choice. Your excessive drinking or drugging will not only eventually kill you, it's likely to literally/figuratively kill or maim plenty of other kids on the playground along the way. Abstinence, for you, is temperance (voluntary self-restraint), not to mention, the prudent thing to do.

BIG BUT.

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions," Saint Bernard of Clairvaux (maybe...).

The good ladies of the WCTU, concerned with all the victims of substance abuse, not just the abuser, fought for, and succeeded in, (temporarily) banning alcohol. The WCTU defines temperance as "moderation in all things healthful; total abstinence from all things harmful." Not a bad personal philosophy.

However, when you start banning the other kids on the playground from this, that, and the other behavior, even with the best of intentions, things can get ugly, fast. Intemperately imposing your, or your religion's, rules and regs on all the other kids, even with the best of intentions, may make things worse by creating new problems.

While sharing the playground requires rules and grups (the rule of law), to ensure the kids have maximum fun (liberty --  and all that founding father's shtuff) you need just enough rules and grups.

 Wikipedia: "Temperance is defined as moderation or voluntary self-restraint."
"Moderation in all things," Ralph Waldo Emerson.

The rule of law + (restrained by) temperance = maximum freedom, but, maximum freedom - (unrestrained by) temperance = chaos.

A happy/healthy playground requires the rule of law (and morality, and good manners, and tolerance, and patience, and security, and...). And the drawing of fine lines. 

That is, deciding on what sorts of behavior we all agree should be punished, and how, in spite of the fact H. sapiens have always done it/will continue to do it anyway. 

That is, refraining from punishing behavior that, while we may punish ourselves for it, or believe that our God will, H. sapiens have always done it/will continue to do it anyway.

Fine lines, but clearly drawn, well thought out lines. For example, I rarely drink, and I don't care much for drunks. I also don't want my grandstickies and great-grandstickies to be drunks. However, even once I become the King of America, I won't ban alcohol, for people 21 or older.

Because I don't care if they (or anyone else) enjoy a drink once in awhile. I don't care if they (or anyone else) occasionally gets drunk, as long as they don't drink and drive. Because I'm a sexy seasoned citizen (see glossary) and I know shtuff.

I know that while murder should be prohibited, for what should be (hopefully) obvious reasons. I also know about the law of unexpected consequences. I know that prohibiting the use of alcohol (and all sorts of things) created a profitable black market for thugs and turned ordinary folks into criminals. I know that The Gummit spent a lot of time, money, and lives trying to stop something that can't be stopped. I know...

[Dana: Yeah? well, there's always gonna' be murderers and...]

Fine lines, clearly drawn. Some things should be prohibited, some things should be regulated, everything else should be tolerated (but not necessarily socially sanctioned). All three categories require consideration of the law of unintended consequences and the fact that ours is a nation designed primarily to maximize liberty (not democracy, but that's another column).

[Iggy, who looks puzzled, speaks: Um, like, I don't get it, Poppa. I thought temperance meant something like not eating a whole box of Girl Scout cookies at one time? Yeah, and what the hell does socially sanctioned mean? adds Dana.]

It does, sticky one, it does, but my style is edited stream of consciousness. Inhale -- Once I got rolling on the liberty v. forcing other people to adopt one's version of temperance via force of law, and, the law of unexpected consequences, and, social sanctions (which, I'm not going to get into, because, it's time to go and I'll save that for part two, whereupon, I will also address the question you posed that made use of your excellent Girl Scout cookie analogy) it became obvious that temperance would require a part two -- breathe. Poppa loves you.

[Iggy: Oh.  Dana: Sheesh.  Marie-Louise: scratch, scratch]

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.

Justice (Part Two)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above↑) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)

Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies,

OK class, let's review.

In Justice (Part One) I discussed the cardinal (hinge) virtue, justice. I posited that its importance is self-evident. I argued that kids in particular, and everyone else in general, are obsessed with justice. That the obsession is summarized by/captured by/epitomized by/etc. the phrase That Ain't Fair!!! Please note the deliberate (and rare, for me at least) use of three exclamation points.

I mentioned the work of Jonathan Haidt, moral psychologist (and one of my heroes). Dr. Haidt's moral foundations theory lists six foundations, one of which is Fairness/Cheating. The relevant Wikipedia article puts it thusly, "Fairness or proportionality: rendering justice according to shared rules; opposite of cheating. Their bolderization, my italicization. 

[I just made up a new word, bolderization. If you don't believe me, look it up. Oh wait, you can't, it doesn't exist. Bolderization: clicking the bold button of a word processor in order to render a word in a bolder way than other words. GRIN.]

Dr. Haidt, incidentally, didn't weave his theory from whole cloth. His work is based on numerous, and ongoing (check THIS out) experiments and studies. You should also read one of his books, "The Righteous Mind." Life-changing, mind -blowing shtuff written in clean, clear English (as opposed to psychobabble).

Anyway, please note the phrase, "rendering justice according to shared rules." In part one I pointed out that we've lost our consensus, that the late sixties ushered in something I call the Great Fragmentation. I ended the column by asking, "So, how do the members of a fragmented culture agree on what constitutes just and fair?"

[Just who is this we've you speak of cranky one? asks Dana, imaginary gentlereader.]

Good question. Hmm... I guess, no, I know, that when I talk about us, or we, I'm usually referring to muh fellow maricans (Lyndon Johnson saying, my fellow Americans). More broadly, the cultures and people of the West. I really should define my terms more in light of political correctness. Citizens of the planet Earth, please accept my insincere apology.

OK. In this particular case, I'm talking about the fragmentation of American culture. I'm also wildly oversimplifying some of Dr. Haidt's conclusions (sorry doc) and adding a few of my own. Read the book folks, you'll thank me.

H. sapiens (not just maricans) are tribal. This is because belonging to a tribe dramatically increases the chance we might live long enough to reproduce and raise our kids. It dramatically decreases the chance we will be killed and/or eaten before having a chance to do so. Also, get enough people on your team and the next thing you know you'll have civilizations and flush toilets and the like.

It's the drive responsible for us v. them. At one extreme it's total war and the demonization of the enemy. At the other, it's the drive behind competitive sports, which serve as a (usually) harmless outlet. See where I'm going here?

It's the reason why up until the sixties, America -- mostly white, mostly Christian, mostly sharing the same playground, and often preoccupied by wars with them and/or struggling to get three hots and a comfortable cot, were (sometimes more, sometimes less) on the same team.

And then the Boomers came of age in an era of unprecedented prosperity and security. A lot of wonderful things happened.  These ranged from the country officially acknowledging the obscenity of slavery and Jim Crow (mostly and eventually) and passing civil rights legislation, to landing on the moon.

Incidentally, these laws and landing on the moon were accomplished by the Greatest Generation, not by the Boomers, who will go down in history for, well, um... oh, I know! Rock n' Roll! And personal computers. Now we all have a home or pocket version of technology originally developed by the..., um, never mind.

But what happens when a generation of callowyutes, raised to take unprecedented prosperity and security for granted, go through the rebellious/idealistic (some anyway)/I ain't gonna' be like my parental units/I hope I die before I get old adolescent (which we now know typically lasts to the age of 25 or so) stage? And let us not forget to mention relatively easy access to the pill (can you say sexual revolution?) and mind-altering drugs.

Well...

[Oh, one second. Yes, we/they were raised taking the possibility of nuclear annihilation for granted (duck and cover) and we/they might also be drafted and die (the males anyway) in Vietnam.

BIG BUT.

By adolescence most realized that if the nukes were launched we'd probably all be dead anyway. Get under your desk, put your head between your knees, and kiss your ass goodbye. Ishhkabibble. As for Vietnam, pursue a deferment or learn to love (and live with) our neighbors to the North.]

Well, what happens is team America -- left, right, and (ever-shrinking) center -- starts fragmenting into cliques/gangs that divide up the playground like a prison yard.

A lot of water passes under the proverbial bridge. H. sapiens will be/were H. sapiens. And here we are.

We can go a-googling 24x7 and prove anything. How? simple. If you want to believe something you'll ask yourself if you can believe it, then you'll go looking for confirmation. You will, inevitably, find some and then you (well, not you or me of course, but most people) will stop looking.

If you don't want to believe something you'll ask yourself if you must believe it, then you'll go looking for reasons not to. You will, inevitably, find some and then you (well, not you or me of course, but most people) will stop looking.

This is the second most important thing the book taught me. That's a tease 'cause you really should read the book.

Modern tech provides a TV channel and/or a website for every taste, from the sublime to the warped and twisted. New sorta-social media platforms appear every couple of eye blinks. Sorta-social? Yup, choose your friends, real and virtual, tweak your settings (or not, the machine will do it anyway). Poof! your own customized playground of the like-minded, and you don't even have to leave the house.

[So, how do we reach agreement on anything? For example, on what constitutes justice. And what about the other cardinal virtues? Iggy, imaginary grandsticky, poses a question.]

Compromise, don't demonize. Breathe. Electronically fast -- turn off your computer and smartphone for 24 hours and go for a walk, read a book, make brownies, go to your grandstickies eighth-grade band concert.

America's newfound and ever-worsening polarization is fueled by demonization (Haidt) and the 24x7 flow of dizzinformation (me). Poppa loves you.

[Compromise!?! How can you compromise with the devil's minions!?! An imaginary troll has wandered into my personal zeitgeist. BANG! Marie-Louise, my muse, unhesitatingly pulls her piece from her garter holster, blows it's head off, and calmly begins scratching my back.]

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

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©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.

Justice (Part One)

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above↑) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)

If we should deal out justice only, in this world, who would escape? No, it is better to be generous, and in the end more profitable, for it gains gratitude for us, and love. -Mark Twain


Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies,

Warning: If you're a regular reader who doesn't much care for my constant references to sharing the playground with the other kids, you're gonna' really hate this column. I'll understand if you choose to bail at this point, although I don't think it would be the prudent thing to do (GRIN).

All the kids have to share the playground and the majority of kids are hardwired with an obsession that I call That Ain't Fair!!! syndrome.

Please note the deliberate use of three exclamation points. Please note that an obsession with fairness is an obsession with justice. Please note that when callowyutes reach the grup stage in the life cycle of H. sapiens the obsession remains. However, it's often, but not necessarily, muted by life's lessons.

[Aside: I chose the word obsessed because in my experience, having been an actual kid several thousand years ago and currently living with four of them in my freakishly large household, obsessed is accurate. Also, even the most mildly mannered grup is acutely aware of justice, or more likely, injustice. As I have  pointed out previously, Earth's a very rough neighborhood.]

So, where does this obsession come from? If you're of a traditional religious bent, there's an excellent chance that you think that it, like everything else, comes from God.

Most psychologists (I know, I know, grain of salt) now believe that we're not born with blank slates, that we arrive already programmed (so to speak) with certain basic information.

Jonathan Haidt is a moral psychologist (and one of my heroes) who has made it his life's work to identify what are the fundamental tenets of what he calls the moral mind. He believes, as do I, that newbie H. sapiens arrive here already wired with these fundamentals.

Note that an atheist, or a fundamentalist, or something in betwixt might find some common ground here. Don't demonize, compromise (DDC).

[This video, a TED talk, not only explains where he's coming from, it explains the difference betwixt progressives and conservatives, and why they're so antagonistic towards each other, in 18 minutes and 32 seconds. You have to listen closely, he talks too fast.]

Now, regardless of where you think this "obsession" comes from, as long as you accept that Justice is a thing and that it affects all of us to one degree or another, you see why it's a cardinal (hinge) virtue. I must also point out that religious or non-religious, left, right or center, and regardless of skin tone, that consideration of the virtues, particularly the four cardinal ones, just might provide some common ground in these unhinged times -- DDC.

[It occurs to me that I didn't explicitly point this out two columns ago when I began this series, this finding common ground theme, which is one of the primary reasons I'm on about the virtues. It's hard out here for a Garrulous Geezer.]

                                                        * * *

So, just what is justice anyway?

Well, besides being "your one-stop-shop for the cutest & most on-trend styles in tween girl's clothing" Justice is...

(Insert sound of car tires screaming from a panic stop, here.)

Okay, wait a sec'. Why is a store that sells glad rags for girls called Justice? 

The Justice Mission
To positively IMPACT and EMPOWER our associates, ALL GIRLS and those that love them by creating authentic connections through FASHION and FUN.

Or... how to say absolutely nothing with 22 words.

And we're back.

My old buddy Merriam-Webster offers up a deluge of definitions for justice. I choose 2a: the quality of being just, impartial, or fair.

[Well duh! What's yer point? Dana the imaginary gentlereader is awake. Marie-Louise, my muse, has taken Iggy (imaginary grandsticky) and gone shopping for new shoes -- yet again.]

My point is that though the definition is rather open-ended and vague, it works because we do have an intuitive grasp of just what justice is. One will encounter gray areas, one will always encounter gray areas.

But I maintain that 98.39% of the time that you will know instantly what's fair, what would be just, in any given situation. Careful, the devil lives in the remaining 1.61%.

Incidentally, I also maintain that one also knows, 98.39% of the time, whether or not what you're doing, have done, or plan on doing -- is right or wrong. This applies to all of the virtues and will be the subject of a column once I get through them.

[Dana: So what's your prob Bob, I... ]

The problem is, besides the 1.61% problem, well, let me put it this way. When I was a kid, I divided my free time (weather permitting) betwixt the 12th street and the 22nd street playgrounds (the former being larger and with more shtuff to do and the latter having a tiny swimming pool).

Kids in the dark ages were also obsessed with justice (fairness) but we shared in a consensus that's now shattered.

The same "rules" (more or less) that ensured justice (including punishment) and fairness applied at both playgrounds -- and at home, in school, in the neighborhood, at your friend's house, etc.

While hardly a utopia (substance abuse, child abuse, racism, bullies, etc.), beyond the formal (statutory) laws, there was rough agreement as to what the social laws were.

[HUGE BUT, Not that they all made sense. If you weren't a person of pallor you suffered from discrimination, ranging from mild to insane. Given groups of people of pallor looked down on other groups of people of pallor. Stupid (behavior) was as stupid (behavior) is.]

Jump to the late sixties. Well-meaning boomers, raised taking an (overall) unprecedented level of prosperity and security for granted (remind you of anyone), start tossing tots out with the jacuzzi water. The Great Fragmentation Begins.

So, how do the members of a fragmented culture agree on what constitutes just and fair? Stay tuned for part two.

Poppa loves you.
Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]



©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.

Dear Prudence

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original to solve the problem and access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse (right shoulder) and back scratcher 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader (left shoulder)

"Did you ever have to finally decide?" -John Sebastian


Dear (eventual) Grandstickies & Great-Grandstickies, 

This is the first of four columns devoted to the four cardinal virtues. 

Last week's column was devoted to what are traditionally referred to as the seven virtues. There are four cardinal (hinge) virtues that are fundamental to all other virtues and this column is devoted to one of them, Prudence. The other three will be covered in future columns.  

There are three theological virtues that are supplied to us, according to the Christian tradition at least, by God. Being an agnostic, I'm in the process of trying to make a prudential decision as to whether or not I'll explore the theological virtues. 

Nowadays, employing prudence usually refers to being careful and cautious.

Classically speaking, it refers to applying reason, wisdom, experience, morality and the like when a decision needs making. Use your brain! as they say. Given what you know, who you are, what you believe, etc., what's your smartest/best move in light of...

[Wait a minute, Mr. Obvious, ain't that the same thing? Dana, imaginary gentlereader, speaks. Iggy and Marie-Louise, imaginary grandsticky and my muse, respectively, both toss me an inquisitive look.]

Nope.

I could be a careful and cautious weasel, carefully and cautiously considering the best way to murder you in your sleep and abscond with your cuckoo clock collection. Most would not define me as a virtuous dude.

But, as I was about to say, what's your smartest/best move in light of the fact that how you go about deciding on a course of action is, or at least should be, a virtue unto itself?

[Iggy: Poppa, I like, don't understand what...]

Patience, sticky one, all will soon become clear. Let me back up a bit.

You, and everyone else, are confronted all day and every day, with choices. They range from the trivial (which flavor of coffee creamer shall I use?) to profoundly important (is this the person I want to marry, do I want to be married to anyone?).

[Dana: Once again our hero demonstrates he has a keen eye for the obvious.]

Stop giggling you lot, and pay attention. In both of the examples above making a prudent decision simply means that regardless of your immediate/initial impulses, adopting a big-picture view and then making the best possible decision under the circumstances. Simple right?

Well, no, not really.

Simple to define, somewhat harder to put into practice. Regardless, you need to choose what's behind door number one, two, or three.

                                                    * * *

Door number one: Immediate/initial impulses, or, "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die", an understandable reaction, given the fact that no one gets out of here alive. This is the choice of least resistance. This is the if it feels good do it option.

Examples: I'm not gonna' worry about how much sugar is in my yummy coffee creamer (or anything else). Life is short, live for today. Get married just because I'm pregnant/I impregnated someone just because it's a fact that having a mum and a dad is any given kids best option? I don't even like him/her! What about my happiness?

I make no judgments. Not (fortunately) my job. I've made no shortage of mistakes and I certainly wouldn't care to be married to someone I don't even like.

BIG BUT

Note that in the first example, coffee creamer, in the short term at least only one person is involved, you. In the second, at least three, and likely, many more. We have to share the playground with other kids.

And I must point out that birth control is available at any convenience store and that employing it would have been the prudent thing to do.

Next up, door... Sorry, listen, while I know this is the era of the casual hookup and that sex, formally considered the most intimate activity two humans beings can engage in, is nowadays just another need to be taken care of, I can't help but wonder.

Given (evil microscopic) bugs, and babies, and the dramatic qualitative difference between having sex and making love to someone you love (or, at least are deeply in like with), I should think that prudence trumps immediately and unconditionally surrendering to your howling DNA.

                                                      * * *

Door number two: Traditional path. You believe in an afterlife of some sort, the nature of which requires that you follow a prescribed ethical/moral code to either go somewhere better than here or reincarnate a step or two up the ladder after you are deleted.

So, either you or someone(s) you take seriously, didn't toss the tot out with the jacuzzi water. Good. You're not just adrift on the Sea of Life, you've set a course and have a destination. Life is hard. Life with a context, less so (more on this in a minute).

Two things. What you say, goes, but only for you (HT: Thaddeus Golas). The sermon you live is much more powerful, and effective, than the sermon you preach.

                                                    * * *

Door number three: The door for people that reject doors one and two. This is my door, and while many choose it, I'll only speak for myself.

First, two more things.

"All generalizations are false, including this one." -Mark Twain.

My three-door theory is a generalization -- and an analogy. Analogies and generalizations, and all words for that matter, are at best, useful symbols. I'll be exploring that subject at some point in the future.

And also, of course, generalizations oversimplify for the sake of clarity. Many, no, most of us, regularly take a peek at what's up behind all the doors.

I try to practice prudence for two reasons. (Today's column is sponsored only by the number two. The letter P didn't pay its bill.) Prudence is what separates the man person from the beastie. Also, life with a context, as mentioned above, is not as hard as life without one.

While I believe in and have written about the concept of gut first, brain later I'm an almost rabid proponent of the importance of brain later. This is the gift that enabled/enables us to rise to/remain at -- the top of the food chain.

Earth's a very rough neighborhood. While I acknowledge that there are legitimate objections raised by ecologically and/or spiritually-minded folks as concerns H. sapiens domination of the playground, it works for me. Brain over brawn.

Thomas Hobbes is famous for pointing out that the state of nature is a war of all against all wherein life is solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short. Word! The state of nature also doesn't include books or grilled cheese sandwiches (shudder).

As to life with a context, yes Virginia (or Iggy), one could plausibly argue that, as is often said, life's a bitch and then you die. Who gives a damn about prudence, or any sort of virtue for that matter? Do as you please and try not to get caught if it's illegal. Door number one thinking.

What I mean by life with a context is simply a life with an imposed framework. Those folks that choose door number two are supplied with a time-tested framework that imposes order on chaos (as defined by the previous paragraph), which is part of the appeal.

In my semi-humble opinion (and I'm not alone), as long as you keep an open mind, a life with context, that is: personal rules, goals, interesting work, a code that defines/acknowledges the sharing of the playground, Arete, or (insert your thoughts here), is just better than embracing self-indulgence and chaos.

[Better?] 

Yup, better.

It feels better. It's something you have to feel, directly experience -- mere words won't do. Decide, resist drifting, and you'll know. If/when it stops working, make a new decision. Poppa loves you.

Poppa loves you,
Have an OK day

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©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   

The Seven Virtues

If you're new here, this is a weekly column consisting of letters written to my grandchildren (who exist) and my great-grandchildren (who aren't here yet) -- the Stickies -- to haunt them after they become grups and/or I'm dead.

[Blogaramians: Blogarama renders the links in my columns useless. Please click on View original (above↑) to solve the problem/access lotsa columns.]

Irregularly Appearing Imaginary Guest Stars

Marie-Louise -- My beautiful muse 

Iggy -- Designated Sticky

Dana -- Designated gentlereader 

"The virtues, like the Muses, are always seen in groups. A good principle was never found solitary in any breast. -Buddha"

Dear (Eventual) Stickies & Great-Grandstickies,

When I went to a Catholic grade school, I was taught the four cardinal virtues and the three theological virtues. Both kinds, I was told, were a very big deal.

I went to a public high school, and the theological virtues, for obvious reasons, were never mentioned. It recently occurred to me that neither were the cardinal ones. Hmmm...

I attended a Catholic grade school for eight years, first through eighth grade. I didn't go to kindergarten or attend a preschool. Most of my fellow students hadn't gone to kindergarten, none had gone to preschool. Head Start didn't start until 1965.

By then I was already in the sixth grade. I mention this to illustrate that it was once possible to grow up in America without formal schooling until the age of six or seven. Amazingly, I've never lived under an overpass or been institutionalized.

Anyway, I haven't thought about the virtues as such for years. I have given some (but not enough) attention to arete.

Arete is a Greek word that, according to this Wikipedia entry, means excellence of any kind, and may also mean moral virtue. I can't remember how I stumbled on the concept but I was immediately fascinated. I've been in pursuit of my personal arete ever since, with decidedly mixed results.

As the Wikipedia entry explains, the concept dates to Homeric times and is all about attempting to live up to one's full potential, being effective, being good at what you do. Being the best possible you includes the pursuit of moral excellence, which is the very definition of virtue.

Which brings us back to where we started, cardinal and theological virtues.

The cardinal virtues have nothing to do with birds or the "princes" of the Catholic church. Cardinal comes from the Latin word cardo (hinge). All other virtues and morality hinge on these four fundamental concepts. Their pedigree dates to the ancient Greek philosophers and have been a thing ever since. Religious and secular philosophers of all stripes have been kicking 'em around for better than 2,000 years.

Well, at least they were a thing. More on that in a moment.

The three theological virtues, in the Catholic/Christian tradition, come from the grace of God They're sort of a list of the basic requirements that need to be met in order to live a Christian life while you're here if you want to get your butt into heaven when you cross over to there.

They are faith (belief in God). Hope (the belief that you'll make heaven if you live right). And charity, or love (love God and everyone else, which implies it's on you to be your brother's sibling's keeper).

Two quick points from your agnostic Poppa.

One, note the simplicity. To hell (pun intended) with dogma wars. If you believe in God, follow a moral code and do what you can to take care of the other kids, you got this.

Two, It's quite easy to secularize these three. If you don't believe in God you can (and regardless, should) find something/someone(s) to believe in and/or work for. This will supply hope (and meaning) even when life is kicking you in the crotch. Finally, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. This will make for a much nicer playground.

That said, the reason I'm writing about the seven virtues is because it occurred to me that given the fact America, and a goodly chunk of the rest of the world, tossed the tot out with the jacuzzi water back in the 60s, perhaps we could find some guidance, and common ground, in the cardinal virtues.

I believe that we react emotionally/instinctively/intuitionally first, rationally (hopefully...) later. While the former is an effective survival mechanism, the latter enables us to live together and, with a little luck, thrive instead of just survive. The creation of the cardinal virtues is the result of the applied reasoning of a lot of individuals who were smarter than I'll ever be.

[For the record: I went a-googlin' and discovered that while the virtues are still a thing in Catholic education, as far as secular private and public schools go, not so much. However, I found this, and more importantly, this. Happy sigh...]

The cardinal virtues are prudence (making good choices, wisdom), justice, temperance (restraint, self-control) and courage (not just bravery, refusing to define yourself as a helpless victim). There are all sorts of other virtues posited but these four were considered to be the foundation stones of a moral life in the Western tradition.

The Western tradition has nothing to do with cowboys or country music. It's a term, now considered politically incorrect in many circles, that refers to a way of looking at, and living in, the world.

It's fallen out of favor because it all but ignored the rest of the world (Africa and Asia) and we're now all one big happy global family. Don't be a hater. Everything is like, relative, ya' know? The Western tradition includes all the evil dead white guys that ruined the world.

I'm a crank and I'm a libertarian. But, I hold some positions normally classified as conservative, others normally classified as progressive. I have a bias towards trying to discover what actually works and trying to discover how the left and right can compromise and peacefully share the same playground.

I'm a crank and I'm a follower of Taoism (an Eastern philosophy) but also a firm believer in much of the Western tradition. I think that the USA, a product of this tradition, though flawed (as is every-one and every-thing), rocks, and I'm glad and grateful this is my team.

I'm a crank. Which is why I'm going to devote my next four letters/columns to my take on each of the cardinal virtues. Poppa loves you.

Have an OK day.


[P.S. Gentlereaders, for 25¢ a week, no, seriously, for 25¢ a week you can become a Patron of this weekly column and help to prevent an old crank from running the streets at night in search of cheap thrills and ill-gotten gains.

If there are some readers out there that think my shtuff is worth a buck or three a month, color me honored, and grateful. Regardless, if you like it, could you please share it? There are buttons at the end of every column.]


©2017 Mark Mehlmauer   (The Flyoverland Crank)

If you're reading this on my website (where there are tons of older columns, a glossary, and other goodies) and if you wish to react (way cooler than liking) -- please scroll down.